Gratitude

1 Chronicles 16:8 Give thanks unto the Lord, call upon his name, make known his deeds among the people.

I looked up gratitude in the Topical Guide thinking that gratitude for Savannah's safe arrival in Toronto would help assuage some of the trauma I went through yesterday as I worried about her traveling alone as a missionary.  I still do not understand all my reactions so I can't really explain my feelings or why I had them.  I can't make you understand!  Maybe someday and maybe it's not important.  I just end up feeling sorry for myself when I go through them and I cry for myself instead of for whatever thing I'm upset about and then I still can't figure it out!

So, this verse says to "make known his deeds among the people."  I hesitate to do this.  Why?  Because as I worried about Savannah yesterday, I knew that God could protect her.  I knew that He had every reason to -- she's a missionary, she is praying, we are praying, everyone is praying for her to arrive safely!  Yet, God didn't tell me she would be.  This could have been because my fear and panic was blocking me from being able to feel His spirit.  But it could have also been, "You know, sometimes you humans gotta just make it on your own.  Follow the path I have given you.  Even when bad things happen, keep your faith.  I'm still here but I will not always interfere.  This life is the time for you to learn to be independent and show me that you can be."

Does He say that?  Is that right thinking?  If it is, then I'm grateful nothing bad happened to Savannah yesterday, yes.  But did nothing bad happen to her because God was protecting her or did nothing bad happen to her because nothing bad happened to her?

I'm confused.  I will continue to ponder.  God will tell me how it works in His time.