Lesson Preparation

I found this anecdote about the afterlife:

A man dies and goes to heaven. Of course, St. Peter meets him at the pearly gates. St. Peter says, "Here's how it works. You need 100 points to make it into heaven. You tell me all the good things you've done, and I give you a certain number of points for each item, depending on how good it was. When you reach 100 points, you get in."
      
      "Okay," the man says, "I was married to the same woman for 50 years and never cheated on her, even in my heart."
      
      "That's wonderful," says St. Peter, "that's worth three points!"
      
      "Three points?" he says. "Well, I attended church all my life and supported its ministry with my tithe and service."
      
      "Terrific!" says St. Peter, "that's certainly worth a point."
      
      "One point? Golly. How about this: I started a soup kitchen in my city and worked in a shelter for homeless veterans."
      
      "Fantastic, that's good for two more points," he says.
      
      "TWO POINTS!!" the man cries, "At this rate the only way I get into heaven is by the grace of God!"
      
      "Come on in!"

I like this anecdote.  It's a good one about how much we need the Lord.  It reminds me of one I heard as a youth:

Three people arrive in heaven and are brought one by one into a separate room where they are interviewed by a man behind a desk. 

The first person comes in and is asked, "How much do you know about Jesus Christ?"  He replies, "Not much.  I was never much into religion in life."  He is thanked and shown out of the room.  

The second person is brought into the room and asked the same question.  This person knows a lot about Christ and spends quite some time expounding details of the savior's life and death.  Then she is thanked and shown out of the room.  

When the last person is shown into the room, there is no time for questions.  He falls to his knees in front of the desk and exclaims, "My Lord!  My God!" 

Good one, right?  How well do we know Christ?  Do we know Him well enough that we recognize His presence from our own experiences in life?

Here's one I made up:

Three people arrive in heaven and are brought one by one into a separate room where they are interviewed by a man behind a desk.

The first person comes in and is asked, "What do you know about your neighbor, Mrs. Smith?"  The man looks at him in confusion.  "Well . . . nothing really.  I never talked to her.  She just was the person who lived next door."  The man is thanked but told that he can't enter heaven at this time and shown through a different door.

The second person comes in and is asked the same question.  The woman thinks that maybe Mrs. Smith will be coming later and they need some help deciding whether she should go to heaven or not.  She is happy to help.  "Oh!  I've gotten the chance to watch her really well over the years!  I've seen her yell at her kids.  Her yard is never tended, either.  One morning I bumped her gate with my car, and you should have heard the tongue lashing she gave me!  If you ask me, that is no way for a Christian woman to behave!"  The woman is thanked, but to her consternation is not led through the door that leads to heaven.

Finally the third person comes in and is asked, "What do you know about your neighbor, Mrs. Smith?"  The woman replies immediately, "Oh!  I just love Mrs. Smith!"  She is shown through the door to paradise.

It seems to me that this life, this "time to prepare to meet God," is really a chance to develop our ability to love.  That's why I like my anecdote, too.